-Poems by Rachel/Chibi Bumpkins-

These are some cool poems by this girl who is designing some artwork for our CD, which once i get will be posted up in the artwork section. You can check out more of her stuff at www.angelfire.com/punk2/peppermint 

Back To Miscellaneous Writings

Back to Writings

 

I woke up, to A dream, I couldn't remember my life or who I was, just feelings. I stroked it with a seam, undoubtedly felt it slip away. Who I am. Just being, condemning. The horrific faces, look upon Me. Hooks inside Their mouths and Teeth on Their backs. I felt comfortable with them, At my chest they Claw and Hack. They help me, by destroying me. I don't know how I got there. but, I don't recall ever being someplace else. Striping me of my power, I have all the courage in the world. Tearing off my flesh, I could feel nothing but cold. Cutting off my hands, they glued them shut to my stomach. Stitching up my self-esteem, my execution plummets. downward, I fall, and fly at the same time. So much pain, could create So much Power. The rage they have inside, Is fairly hard to hide. The agony, and Bliss to be such a Beast. The new faceless reflection I'll soon have to greet. They rip apart my Skin, but I don’t know how I got here. They bite and snag through my intestines, I feel warm, free from fear. The only thing I remember is pain, a new triumph I could now sustain. The errors of being Human I spare ourselves. The cares of having Flesh is no longer an issue. Now I Am a Beast, a Master of my own nightmares. I am my own pain and, The only one who exists. Stitched up, with 70 layers of skin, vomit-stained, I bathe in sin. I could never recall being aware, Visions in my mind, dreams distorted, and screams cried. The last time I blink, I don’t know what to think. My eyes and neck are sawed closed. dampened fingers, run through my rib cage. an itch I can't scratch, leads to eternal rage. The horrific faces, Cursed within me. Hooks with their shouts and teeth on their backs. I feel comfortable with them, At my best they throw me back. They help me, by killing me. stabbing my back and thrilling me. I don’t know how I got here. but I don’t recall ever being someplace else. I'm now in a dream, not living, but I feel more than before. I know who I am, no feelings. just pain. I peeled it, with a scream, its all melting away, disfigured faces disguise our praise. sewn onto a million bodies, everywhere I look there's faces, they've all become a part of me. no feelings, just metal decay. with all these blank stares, beguiling me. I deceive myself. Everyone’s watching, but I’m all alone. Different voices, but I’m just a clone. So many with me. I'm all that exists. We're my own pain, I'm the only one that exists

that face, your face... so beautiful, words cannot define. skins of identity I find so divine. It runs out of my mind, pictures cannot lock in your true amazing lustre, this face I had long since forgotten re-entered my heart and mind. a smile so bright had left me blind.

I have an ache in my belly, and a hole in my heart. Trapped away I’m falling apart. I wish I could love you. when you spit on my fate. You threw my future in the air, and all I grow is hate. My nightly visions have formed into lust. and repressed disgust. To escape is a must. A dark shadow-like hallway, where she plays with her dolls. with the blank stare. In the lonely, soiled hallway... You always thought she'd always be there. The only sunshine she knew were the burn-marks on her pale, dying skin. The tiny flowers on her muddy dress, shine like glass and are just as sharp when she tries to laugh. She chews her hand off, the pain is numbing as her rigid, small teeth slither across her dysfunctional nerves. Blood splatters little at a time. Down her legs and onto the floor. Even with all of her cries, she can't open the door. The Rain falls hard, and leaves stains on windows that are barred. her screams become louder, but her mouth is full. Her face is covered in blood, her hands are full of mud. She blinks and sees fleas and maggots, scatter past her small limbs. The numbing has turned into throbbing, as she stares into the lobby. I can see her crying, in that same hallway. I thought she'd never go there. to her soul, she's left unrepaired. I have a crack in my head, from the lies you dread. I wish I could love her, she's not me I can see through her. She spits in my face, all that grows is disgrace.

an hour is about to run out, I was beginning to fade. slipping deeper into a darker oblivion. hidden beneath my blanket of hatred, windows covered with denial. systematically shredding away each layer of bad memories. chewing on the scabs, this sores growing bigger. so many pieces of myself are scattering farther away from each other. pulling myself apart, I had nothing to lose anymore. the last ounce of hope stranded never to be found. peel my skin, the biting and the kicking, a time bomb ticking. eat my flesh, devouring every last bit of my remorse for humanity, you come onto me in the matter of an unexpected death, mourning over the decomposition of what I was becoming. I find the world in you, all the pieces that have drifted away have combined to form a greater form of dependency, a purer form of hypocrisy. my eyes roll back and my heart stopped beating, these contusions perform paralysis. love can make me so sweet. these sudden movements in my head, in my dreams make me nervous. they're everywhere so I hold tighter to this blanket of truth I find in you, the only truth I’ve ever known is what you've shown me.

the sun consumes us all, my hatred devours the infected remains of a decomposing corpse you call society. I’ve already lost the grasp on life I never had. and now with each day I live is another day he drifts farther away from my belonging. all of these losses and broken promises, is this what you call remorse? I couldn’t begin to understand this love I feel, never will my human hands feel the tips of your existence. I want to preserve these dreams that seem so real, the only time I feel alive is when I am completely numb to the blistering pain associated with infinity. Tainted by all my failed attempts for empty affection, I’m broken and my wounds are open gasping for air. Deeper they go, as my discomfort flows, so many reasons for destruction. So little begging I hear your demise draws near. Breed in weakness. Feed on strength and live from me. The flies are collecting one-by-one your jaw has sunken in, just like the minority you are, I wish I could sleep forever, death is so painful but when your expiration implies life, I’ll be there. Holding your hand squeezing so hard. Hurting so much. Stop this pain. On, and, off... like a broken doorstop, keeps tripping me. The nightmares are real. Do I look helpless to you? My arms are tied behind your face. I am so full. I am so full of this place. Watch me expand, and as my dry scaly flesh tears you apart severing your internal organs, remember that my life means nothing to me. Desire for your longevity is what sets me free. So weak, see the crippled body, the only thing remaining from a well-too-deserved beating, the song gets louder as I begin to slip. Hurting the ones I love, I’ve lost my grip. Pushing you away, afraid you're getting too close my walls break down and I walk through the shit my world used to be. It has crumbled into the dirt it spawned from, I walk outside and it hurts. I’ll never be like you. Not in a world I hate, but you're in me. And that drives me into a deeper lunacy than portrayed on my back. I refuse. I will not co-operate with a race that promotes over-tolerance. I will not concede defeat and rest in your ignorance. These demons keep pulling me closer to hell, I cannot reach the angels I’m too far in. holding onto this scratched up skin. Puss-ridden limbs rot and decay. Fate means god wanted it this way. I refuse.

 

Back To Miscellaneous Writings

Back to Writings